


Hannibal Please Tell Me You Didn't Kill The Dean Again

by erinather



Category: Hannibal (TV)
Genre: Alpha Hannibal Lecter, F/F, M/M, brian zeller is a closeted homophobe, don't take this seriously, frat hannibal au, frat house, will graham frat boy
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-02-03
Updated: 2021-02-03
Packaged: 2021-03-14 09:28:26
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,063
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29168838
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/erinather/pseuds/erinather
Summary: Hannibal, Will, team sassy science, and others go to university.
Relationships: Will Graham/Hannibal Lecter
Comments: 9
Kudos: 9





	1. Stagman University

**Author's Note:**

> im so sorry for whoever has to read this. creds to the lesbian hannibal discord server ! !

Will Graham stares at his laptop, old and dusty. A 3 note chime alerts him to his Gmail tab, he reads the title “In regards to your fraternity application”. The email reads as follows:

“Dear Mr. Graham,  
On behalf of Theta Chi Fraternity, let us start by congratulating you on your acceptance into Stagman University. Being admitted into Stagman is an accomplishment in itself and we would like to congratulate you. First and foremost, our brothers take great pride in being apart of this University and you will soon come to see why. We hope that in addition to your endeavors here that you will make the commitment to become a Fraternity brother. In doing this you will be provided with the values and skills needed to succeed in life. 

Rush is the backbone of our fraternity, and we devote much time and effort to the selection of our members. We usually begin recruitment for the upcoming year in January and continue on until Formal Rush at the beginning of the academic year. Each rush event is created to provide a very informal, laid back atmosphere in which brothers and rushees can enjoy getting to know one another on a more personal level. Some of our more exciting rush functions in the past have included: Paintball Trips, Flag Football Games, BBQ, Bowling, Poker Night, and more. For every function, the chapter will provide transportation, lodging, and anything else that you may need. Although we do focus significantly on our summer beach rush program, we will have to cancel that event due to the eroding cliffside. If you are unable to make it to any summer events, we will still make every effort to meet you at the beginning of the school year or during Formal Rush. 

If you have any questions at all, don’t be afraid to call my cell or e-mail me. Please also fill out our Rush Interest Form to receive further information on how you can join our fraternity. We wish you the best of luck at Stagman University and look forward to seeing you here soon.”

Will finishes reading the email and begins fist-pumping the air.  
“Hell yeah!” He exclaims, and rushes down the stairs, hollering:  
“Mom! Mom I got into my frat isn’t that sick?!”  
She pauses her dishwashing and removes her bright yellow rubber gloves.  
“Yes, honey. That’s very ‘sick’.” She sighs. Will stands in the kitchen awkwardly.  
“Sweetheart, could you rinse these dishes for me? Just put them on the rack when you’re done.” Will’s mother asks, returning to the sink sans gloves. She reaches for silverware lingering at the bottom of the sink.  
“Shit! That water is hot. Hand me my gloves please William.” She says, shaking her hands to cool them. Will hands his mother her gloves and turns to leave the kitchen.  
“Will, aren’t you going to help me? Will?” she calls to him. Will stops on the landing and yells back:  
“I can’t mom I have to get a roommate before all the good dorms are gone! Ugh!” Will hurries up the stairwell, his socked feet slipping on the hardwood floors that his mother polishes incessantly. He opens his laptop, emulating a burnt, crispy smell. He opens his email once again to see an email from a “Brian Zeller” (brian.the.zell2hell.420@yahoo.com). The email reads:  
“Hey dude, so i found this super nice dorm on campus you wanna room w me?? Its like...500 bucks a month. I saw youre a sycology major, im majoring in pathology. U should totally meet my friend beverly she could def set u up with someone. Oh yeah and theirs a RA. i asked if he was gay and he asked for my student id card? The fuccccck? His names Hannibal, it’s not a very swag name… what type of name is that elmao?? Whatevsssss. Email me back ASAP!!!!  
-Brian Z  
Oh ps dont bring any drugs plss my mom drug tests me every week. thx!”

Will stares at the email, wide-eyed. He types,  
“Sounds good. I’ll meet up with you and check the place out.” and clicks send.


	2. Traumatized Cashiers

Will lies curled up in his creaky twin-sized bed, his brow furrowed and twitching. He murmured to himself groggily,   
“No…. no, I don’t want to eat that.. Stop.”   
Will often had nightmares, most of them about being forced to consume roadkill, insects, and all. Will woke with a gasp, covered in sweat. He turned to look at his alarm clock, the bright red numbers bleeding into the darkness surrounding them. 6:32. Today is moving day. He lays on his sweat-dampened sheets, contemplating whether or not he should get up now. He decides to get out of bed, he’ll need all the time he can get to pack. Will walked on tiptoes to the bathroom, trying not to creak the floorboards. He looked himself in the mirror, his hair slicked back into an Elvis style shape from all the sweat.  
Wait.. this is kind of a vibe, he thinks to himself, flexing his biceps in the mirror. He moves the shower curtain to the side and reaches for the metal faucet. He pauses and ponders his hair, before turning to leave the bathroom, he’d much rather keep this style natural instead of using pounds of gel to achieve the look. Before leaving, he quickly sprays his hair with his mom’s scented dry shampoo. He treads lightly out of his room, trying his best not to wake up his many dogs. 

“Winston! Winston!” he whispers through his teeth to his dog. Winston paws over to Will and buries his nuzzle in Will’s armpit before lightly sneezing and padding away from Will.  
I wonder what that’s about… Will thinks to himself. He stands and walks to the kitchen. He flicks on the light, wincing at the bright light. Will walks to the fridge and retrieves two pieces of bread, mayo, and a banana. In the pantry, he grabs a jar of chunky peanut butter and sets down all his ingredients on the counter. When he’s finished assembling his sandwich, he moves to the living room and eats it in silence. 

\-------------------

“Hannibal Lecter.” says the convenience store cashier, reading Hannibal’s laminated ID, clipped to his argyle sweater. Hannibal rolls his eyes, aggressively setting down a chocolate chip muffin and an apple.   
“Strange name, that it. Hannibal.” the cashier repeats, scanning his items. Hannibal stares at her name tag, it reads, “Carla Roberts”.   
“Ms. Roberts, could I ask you for your card? Hannibal asks, smirking. Carla looks up at Hannibal.  
“Wow, an accent too! What is that...Dutch?” she replies, ignoring his question. Hannibal narrows his eyes, glaring at her. Rude, rude, rude! He thinks to himself.   
“Lithuanian,” he says bluntly. He snatches his bag and struts out of the store, annoyed. I could wait for her to leave the store and get her from there… but I have to move in today. I need to focus. He takes out his cell phone and dials a number.  
“Father? Yes. Yes, I got breakfast already. Can you give me my keys back I really need my car. Daddy, please? Thank you, Papa.” Hannibal returns his cell to his pocket.  
“Ow!” he exclaims and sucks on a cut on his finger he just received. Carefully reaching back into his pocket, he retrieves a knife.  
“Oh, perfect.” He grasps the knife and opens the door to the convenience store once again, triggering a small electronic dinging noise. He looks at the cashier, and the cashier looks back at him.   
“You’re not Carla,” Hannibal says, scowling at the new cashier. At the register is a young woman with long black hair and a large sidebang covering her left eye. Her name tag reads “Abigail Hobbs.” she replies,  
“Obviously not,” she rolls her eyes. “She’s in the back if you want to talk to her. Customers aren't allowed back there but I’ll let you as long as you don't talk to me.” Hannibal thought this was fairly rude, but at the same time found her frank reply refreshing.   
“Ok. If you scream or run I will kill you.” He replied. 

Abigail bursts out laughing, her eyes become teary and she starts fanning them with her hands.  
“What and ruin your Gucci sweater?” She spits out in between fits of laughter. Hannibal puts his hands on his hips.   
“It’s Armani. And it won’t ruin my sweater to snap your neck.” He says, attempting to sound intimidating, and he would have if it weren’t for his voice cracking at the end of his sentence. The cashier falls to the floor cackling. She has completely given up on containing her tears and all that’s left of her thick black eyeliner is two grey tearstains down her blushed face.   
“Stop laughing at me! I’ll kill you and I’ll eat you!” he yelled. Abigail gasped for air and replied to Hannibal,   
“You’re a cannibal? Been there, done that.” she stood up and dusted off her clothes. Hannibal looked at her, bewildered.  
“Been there done that? Really?” he said, dumbfounded. Abigail glared at him.  
“I DON’T like talking about this...but my dad was a cannibalistic serial killer. Anyways, are you more of an ‘arr arr eat raw meat!’ type of cannibal, or do you prefer your people cooked?” she asked.   
“How dare you! Do I look like an ‘arr arr’ type of person to you?” Hannibal replies, scoffing. Abigail looks him up and down.  
“I don’t know. Maybe?” she says, wiping the half dried eyeliner on her cheeks. Hannibal folds up his pocket knife.  
“You know what? Forget this. I have places to be.” He rushes out of the store, pulling down his sweater cuffs.   
“Arr arr…” he mutters to himself, scowling.

\------------------

Will hauls his last box, labeled “important”. Inside is axe body spray, his computer, and various loose pieces of paper. He sets down the box in the trunk of his mom’s Subaru. He walks over to the passenger door and climbs inside. His mother scrunches her nose.  
“Oh! what is that smell?” she says, before looking at Will. She waves her hand in front of her nose.  
“Sit in the back.” She says. Will isn’t sure why he has been banished to the backseat, but he goes anyway. The car ride from Will’s house to the Stagman campus is fairly short, probably only 40 minutes. By the time Will can see the gates to the campus, his hair has completely returned to its regular curly state. His mother had ambushed him with a cloud of dry shampoo and spray-on deodorant when they stopped for snacks. They turned into the parking lot of a fairly run-down dorm building and Will got out of the car. In front of the building was a young man with a pretentious haircut. He’s very overdressed for moving in day. Will thought to himself. The man is pointing and ordering people around his car, they seem to be helping him transport all of his things. Will watches as a variety of things are transported from the man’s car. Lamps, fuzzy coats, designer bags. He spots Brian waiting near the building, waving to him. He waves back and walks over.   
“Why is a guy like that living here?” Will asks. Brian raises an eyebrow.  
“Gay people can go to college too Will.” He says, looking concerned. Will stares at Brian, confused.   
“Not gay people! Rich people!” He responds. Brian laughs lightly and pats Will on the shoulder. He replies,  
“Ohhhhh. Yeah, I thought that too. That’s the RA, Hannibal I was telling you about. Apparently, he’s renting out the whole top floor.” Will rolls his eyes and scoffed. He pauses, Hannibal is approaching them. He speaks to them,  
“Hello. I am Hannibal Lecter, an RA at this dormitory.” Will’s heart began beating fast. Nervously, he spits out the first words that come to mind.  
“Uh, hi, n-nice to gay you. Meet you.” Will turned bright red. Hannibal was surprisingly calm, too calm. They stood there in silence for a couple of seconds. Brian broke the silence,  
“Uh, Hannibal? You in there?” Hannibal snapped out of his Will induced daze.   
“What?” He replied.  
“What?” said Brian. Will turns around and starts bringing his boxes up to his room. What a weirdo. I’m going to avoid him as much as possible. Will thought to himself.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> im spending too much time on this already.


End file.
